I'm not stable...

Recently my shooting performance has been like a roller-coaster ride. On one training, I adjusted the place that the gun butt sits on. Adjusted it nearer to my body. Then after that I shot minimum 97, so got quite confident.

Then, the next training, I try to do the same thing again. I use my new position and shot a 100 in my 1^st series. Then it started going downhill. My second series shuai 3 times, make the grouping damn horrible. But the thing is the rest of the shots were all tens, and area only about 1¼ the size of the 9 ring. Then comes the third series. I shot like 2 8s to the right within the 1^st five shots. Since only 2^nd series, I decide to push. Refocus, pull the grouping back into the centre by the 7^th shot. Then the rest all 10. the result: like 94-95.

The 4^th and 5^th series cannot remember already, but I know that they not much better than the 2^nd and 3^rd. also the same case, afew tens, then one that shuai very far. After that, depending on my mental condition, I can slowly pull the shots back or I will continue shooting until i finish. I think the final scores were 100-97-94-95-96.

This would sound like a normal bad training, but for me it’s another disappointment. For close to 1½ years, I have been continually changing and tweaking my position until I can shoot stably. I will change position, do well for one training, then do badly for the next 2-3. As a result, I have not felt secure or felt that my position is stable for very long already.

The position that I use to shoot my best scores also make me shoot badly. The position that I use to shoot 100s also make me shuai every other shot. Why can’t I be like other shooters, that change their position once every year or so, and change because their coaches have decided that they have reached that level, and are ready to move on…

I know I am also lucky that I am already shooting at this standard. I also know that there are lots of shooters out there that are also struggling harder than me to improve themselves. So I wonder if I have the place to say these kind of thing. But the thing for me is, that I keep getting false hope. I can shoot 585, then I feel damn happy that I finally reach that standard. Then the next shoot I go in full of confidence, and the shots just don’t work out. My 3 best shoots all result in me doing badly for the next 2 months. The worst was when I shot 588 and 584 two months in a row. After that I was stuck at mid 570 for two months. And not just competition, training during that two months also stuck at 570. so right now, I really don’t know what to do.

I know I don’t usually lament about these kind of things in real life, but aiyah, this is a blog what, whatever I feel I just type lor. How was this for a 1^st post